The other night I was lying in bed and looking at my Facebook moments from six years ago and I realized how easy social media makes it to reminisce. How with a couple posts and pictures I was suddenly overcome with nostalgia.
I’ve made a lot of positive changes since my teens. I’m not nearly as dramatic and I now know what I want in life. I realized that there are so many girls that are in the same position I once was. While this is a letter directed to my past self, I do hope it comforts anyone who is currently hurting or feeling like there isn’t much to look forward to.
Embrace that first heartbreak. There is no pain quite like it, but with it comes wisdom. You’re better off – trust me.
Let the nice guy take you on a date, you’re going to laugh until you can’t breathe and your face will hurt from smiling nonstop.
Skip the drama. You don’t have to be friends with everyone. Don’t people please for the sake of wanting to be liked.
Listen to your gut. If you’re uncomfortable with a situation, get out.
Food is not the enemy and you don’t have to negate the calories you consume. Enjoy having the metabolism that you do and workout to be an athlete, not to be skinny.
Spend more time with your family, because you’ll soon move away and miss the craziness.
High school is not the best time of your life, whoever said that is lying and didn’t go to college.
College is not the best time of your life either, whoever said that didn’t spend a month in Europe.
Your current self will find a way to top it.
Make loving yourself a priority right now. If you know your worth, it’ll save you from trying to prove you’re worth it.
Make your faith a priority. Hard times will come and turning to God instead of other vices will save you a lot of tears.
Keep writing! All of those emotions will produce pieces you’ll re-read for years.
Lastly, read this:
“Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things.” -Zooey Deschanel
You want so desperately to see the goodness in people. Don’t let being ‘let down’ too many times turn you into someone cold. For a time, you will pride yourself in being stoic. But then you will miss allowing your heart to feel deeply. Don’t miss moments because you’re so focused on not unleashing your ugly cry face.
Your older, wiser, acne free self
I don’t expect the rest of my twenties to be a cake walk, but I do know that having a positive mindset will help me through the hard times. I desperately wish I would have walked away from some of my past situations – but then again, I wouldn’t be the person I am today without them! I don’t necessarily believe that everything happens for a reason, but I do think that learning from past mistakes and having a positive mindset play a role in my current happiness.
Yesterday’s sermon was actually about a hardened heart and how changing our external environment won’t fix our hearts. With a little introspection I realized that all of the positive changes I made stemmed from an attitude adjustment. Moving to Austin didn’t “fix” me; neither did lifting weights and eating healthy. It honestly all began with being fed up. Fed up with being sad and feeling sorry for myself to the point my actions were destructive rather than proactive. Deciding I was going to be thankful rather than pitiful. Deciding I was going to make changes for myself, rather than waiting for someone to rescue me. A woman who is sure of herself and willing to work hard for what she wants is a force to be reckoned with. Start describing yourself as relentless and driven instead of desperate and pathetic. Be your own hype man. Then be a woman of your word (to others and yourself) and watch your life transform.